a combined post (sort of)

Hello out there… this is supposed to be a combined posting form Michael and Jerusha but seeing as the father has just eyed my milo declared its a good idea and then bumbled off to the toilet, this post is looking a bit solo at present…

today was my day at home while Michael was at uni. he rang us to report that his morning lectures were just fab but by the time that we saw him arrive home this arvo the enthusiasm was somewhat diminished. However, at least M is getting his degree sorted and then the wide world of graduate recruiting is available to him should he so desire. ‘Moral philosophy’ just isn’t doing it for him at the moment.

Ant has been being cute as per usual. he is getting into his food when he’s not constipated. The health nurse people said that this was common when a bfeed babies start on solids. So we have to feed him brown sugar syrup in addition to the puree whatever he’s having. gotta keep things moving or things get very tired and ugly. He is getting really rather chubby and is continuing to flap around on the floor to try to get moving. He can do the 180 spin on his belly now.

What have our challenges been this week – the joy of budgeting on a single monthly salary. we got down to about $90.00 with a week and a half to go! its homebrand nappies for Ant this fortnite. I have been busy at work, fighting with certain in laws, trying to juggle work and parenting. Interestingly someone said to me that the guilt will never go away and i was surprised because i don’t feel guilty about working. i am perfectly ok with it – so long as Ant is happy. how i will go when he is in childcare rather than with M i don’t know. it’s more just the lack of sleep and the feeling of having no time when there isn’t someone demanding something of you. It doesn’t help that my work is the sort where people come to me with a problem that exists or will exist and they want me to help them out. it never bothered me before I had a baby. Babies by their nature are demanding. 10 seconds to myself would be welcome! And this is no criticism of M who does a pretty fab job of dad and husband.

Ahh – M has returned – what have your challenges been my husband???

just to clarify one thing – i did not go to the toilet to make milo. those two elements were distinct and separate. now i’ve cleared that up… challenges.

ummm, getting more food in his gob than on his hands, feet, legs, chair, nose, eyebrows, hair, floor, table, me. he thoroughly enjoys his food and manages to eat quite well considering he is only 7 months old – he insists on using the spoon himself (we use a two spoon relay/swap approach to maximise the amount of spoon in mouth time) but hasn’t quite mastered the fine motor control fully just yet, hence the abstract Pollock style food painting extravaganza that is feed-time around these parts. and he eats all sorts of food – not just stuff out of a mass produced baby food tin or bottle – we bought a small counter food processor that we use to mash up pretty much anything we have eat ourselves.

some things he has scoffed (and enjoyed) lately in case you are so bored you want to read what our baby is eating: lamb, beef, garlic, chickpeas, beans, peas, pork, fish, apple, sultana, prunes (he likes prunes), ginger, pasta, rusks, broccoli, pumpkin, beetroot, yoghurt, porridge, rice cereal, cinnamon, cheese, sweet potato and of course bath water (although that last one is by accident rather than design).

not enough sleep. yes, Antony sleeps much longer during the night now but still need to get up to roll him off his belly or put his dummy back in or such several times in an average night, this might only take a minute or so but it leads to disrupted sleep (not to mention the wife’s snoring!!).

the other main challenge is not getting time to do anything. i don’t begrudge any time spent with Ant but it makes it difficult to do anything much when he requires constant attention all day. just lately he has been especially clingy to the point that i can’t leave the room without him getting upset so seriously limits what gets done during the day. some days it is near impossible to even simply have a shower. i understand that this is pretty normal for his age and i love spending the time with him as i said but makes it difficult to make progress on things like, oh i don’t know, the big fat uni essay i have due next week and haven’t started yet, it’s only worth half the mark for the course so no pressure there…. right.

also this week on monday we had a half day of screaming and distraught behaviour (the baby not me – although by about 2pm i was getting pretty distraught myself) – given the big change after the application of some Seda lotion to the aforementioned screamer’s gums he settled down so i’m guessing his teeth are giving him grief again, no visual sign of them yet beyond a couple of small white lumps on his gums but definately appears to be active in that department. no, i don’t know why it took me half a day to think of the gums/teeth/lotion, you try to think logically on not enough sleep while dealing with a screaming child that you just wish you knew what was wrong so you could help them (it is distressing for the parent to see them like that) but of course he hasn’t quite managed the power of speech yet so comes down to guesswork for now.

oh and J forgot to mention that DD and CJ (her dad and step-mother) were in town the other weekend for a brief visit. it was great to see them and they got to spend some quality time hanging out with Ant, which was enjoyed by all involved. Thanks again to DD and CJ for not only visiting but also for buying us a fantastic dinner at Beyond India (in DD’s words – the best Indian restuarant he has been to in Australia) – Ant joined us but did not partake in any of the scrumptious food on offer, well not directly anyway – curry flavoured breast-milk may have featured later. Oh and CJ is knitting a new jumper for Ant which looks great but we were a bit concerned about the foot and a half long sleeve… seems the pattern may have gone a little awry, back to the start on the arms then.

nothing much more to report at the moment i don’t think other than we are all looking forward to Grandpa Peter and Brenda visiting us from the states in August when they will get to meet Ant in the flesh for the first time (damn the tyranny of distance…).

that’s it for now.

the bearded hausfrau

So how is it being a house husband and looking after the little man pretty much full time (J does Wednesdays when she is off work and i am at Uni).

Well it seems like the most obvious thing to say but i really do love it. It is amazing being able to spend so much time with Ant, especially as he just grows and grows. He is not only getting bigger but he is doing more and more things all the time. Latest tricks are grabbing hold of his bottle himself at feed time, “helping” with the spoon while he eats his mashed whatever it is that day (sweet potato and cheese was a hit), rolling over and holding his head up strong etc etc. He hasn’t quite got the crawling thing worked out yet but the last few days he has been rolling on to his belly and then sticking his bum right up in the air and concentrating hard so not long before he is really on the move me thinks.

The other really obvious thing about being mr mum is it is really bloody tiring. I know that sounds like a no brainer but seriously… For all the people who thought/think I am having a holiday let me assure you that the combination of looking after a 6 month old baby all day and overloading at uni and various family/social commitments does not a holiday make – it is hard work and very, very tiring. Not that i regret any of it! I love doing it and am thrilled to have the opportunity to be able to have this time with Ant as he develops, it is very important to me.

I can’t quite believe how quickly the time is going, has it really been 6 or 7 weeks since i started my leave from work? Doesn’t feel like it at all.

Claire wanted to know what we do with our time during the day. Typically it involves a lot of rolling around on the floor and playing with a variety of toys – his favourites this week are the stacking cups (cool ones with different coloured rotating sections and beads that rattle when you shake them), his sausage roll sized orange caterpillar thing that squeaks when you squeeze it and the Tolo cube thing with the spinning ball, spinning log, spinning mirror inside thingy-ma-jig. I gotta admit it is much more fun getting down on the floor with the boy than just watching him from the couch. We also read books together, or rather i read them to him and he tries to disassemble them. We also listen to a lot of music during the day as well. I have limited the repertoire somewhat for the moment and have controlled myself and so far not played anything too weird or aggressive (what J would call “angry boy music”) from the collection; he likes the ProLo CD Kami gave me. I try and avoid the idiot box during the day as Ant has a tendency to stop whatever he is doing and go all square eyes at it if it is on, not that i mind as i don’t want to watch daytime tv anyway.

There is also feeding time which has become much more involved now that solids (mush) is part of the diet – think mashed food raspberrys (not the fruit but the mouth/lips movement) with a gob full of partially digested goop, wild flinging hands that have been in the mouth with said partially sucked on goop, pushing goop out with the tongue, goop on clothes (his and mine), faces – forehead, eyebrows, up nose, in ear, in hair (again his and mine), on legs, on feet, on the chair, on the floor, on the table – the cat has as yet avoided the indignity but that is only because she is chucked outside during the day. And here’s a tip – clean up as much of the goop as you can find at the time because that stuff will set like concrete if you miss it.

Nappy changing doesn’t faze me, you very quickly get used to your own kid’s poo and is no big deal – having said that i have said before and will say again the Angelcare Captiva nappy bucket unit thing is great – really, no smell once the nappies are inside it.

Occasionally we go visiting to see Aunt Lyndy and cousin Beth or take a trip to the shops for a bit of a change of scenery but that’s about it. If I’m lucky Ant will have a couple of naps throughout the day but not always and when he does it is usually only for about half an hour at a time.

And that doesn’t sound like a lot I suppose but seriously you get nothing done. Some days it is not until J gets home from work before I get a chance to even have a shower. Maybe other ‘mums’ out there are more organised or disciplined than me but i really struggle to achieve much at all during the day when looking after the boy unless i make a conscious effort to get ready and get out of the house by mid-morning. Otherwise it is a good 6 or 7 hours on the floor playing with the kinder and not much else of anything – forget housework, study, art projects, surfing the net etc etc that all goes out the window.

And i wouldn’t have it any other way. To see the smile on his face (no kidding he smiles with his whole face) is just such a joy it is worth everything. And on a good day you get lots and lots of smiles.He is a happy, beautiful boy and i am so lucky to be able to spend so much time with him.

house husband

who wants Michael to write an entry about being a stay at home dad…???

leave a comment to make him feel obligated to do it (it might be that he won’t listen to me…)